When Left to My Own Devices

August 2nd, 2006

So I get back from Mexico, and what does Stevel do? He flies to Boston. This is the first time I’ve stayed here by myself, and I dig that, because I can make a huge mess and alphabetize the CDs and spend 12 hours cleaning and reorganizing the kitchen cabinets and sleep all afternoon to get over my sinus cold, but the timing is so bad. I haven’t seen him for four weeks, and then I get one day! Why can’t he go to Boston one of the times I’m sick of him or something?

When I used to stay alone at my parents’ house, I would get paranoia about one of the men from FBI’s Most Wanted breaking in, or of alien abduction, which was actually a realistic fear, because there is a field precisely the size of a space-ship landing circle in my parents’ backyard. But here I don’t worry at all, because in the Villa Monica are several elderly women who have the police on their speed-dials and are suspicious of everyone, even the UPS man, and who are nosy and look in our windows a lot. It’s like having a yard full of guard dogs who smoke Virginia Slims and wear pastel-colored polyester pants.

Somehow the cats missed the memo that I’m here alone, because do you think they keep me company all day? No. Linus is working four-hour shifts sleeping on first one half-unpacked suitcase-from-Mexico and then another, while Mia spends her time destroying things on whatever floor I am not currently occupying. For example, yesterday, she batted several bottles of perscription meds into the dishwater, dampening several hundred dollars worth of drugs I require in order to be patient with such antics. Luckily, they dried out enough for me to carefully pluck each one off the single ball they had formed by sticking one to the other. Even more luckily, Mia did not find her way up to the drying area and feast herself into an overdose.

2 Responses to “When Left to My Own Devices”

  1. Bridget Says:

    Ah, kitties. Would you like another one? A sweet, but very noisy-at-annoying-times one might come available soon. Or he might be dead from his owner flying into a murderous rage from lack of sleep.

    Glad you are home safe and sound, but sorry you aren’t feeling so well. Get well soon!

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